June 2008
Find Age-Appropriate Volunteer Opportunities for Your Preteen or Teen
Focus on Positive
Discipline This Summer
Reinforce Your Middle-Schooler’s Money Skills This Summer
Humor May Help
You Deal with Annoying Behaviors
A Word From the Director
More and more,
middle schools require students to perform community service each
semester. Why not have your child do some over the summer? Kids typically
have less to do than during the school year. It’s a great time to devote
to helping others.
Here are some
activities that are appropriate for your child’s age. Discuss these with
her (or get her suggestions) and choose one according to her interests and
abilities.
Your preteen can:
ü
Be a
counselor-in-training. She can help at a summer program for younger
children.
ü
Babysit for a family she knows that
really needs help with child care. Consider doing it for free.
ü
Conduct a food drive. She can ask
neighbors, friends and family to donate canned food and deliver it to a
shelter or food bank.
ü
Record herself reading popular
children’s books. Take the recordings to a children’s hospital wing.
ü
Do yard work for a person who is
elderly or has a disability.
Your teenager can:
ü
Be a counselor at a summer program
for younger children.
ü
Be a mentor for a younger child or a
preteen.
ü
Tutor a child in math or reading over
the summer. Do it for free.
ü
Sign up to work for a campaign, if
she is interested in supporting any of the candidates in this fall’s
elections.
ü
Read to older people at an assisted
living center, or volunteer to go once a week and lead a game, such as
bingo.
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By middle school,
your child will have learned to tune out negative discipline, such as
yelling. And you have probably realized that it doesn’t work anyway.
This summer,
when you may see more of your child, use positive discipline whenever
possible. In return, you may see a positive change in your child by
summer’s end.
Here’s how to
get started:
Be generally
pleasant, even if your
child is not! Smile. Show affection – hugs or a pat on the arm or
shoulder.
Encourage
your child to learn a new
skill this summer. Cooking a meal is a great one to try. Remember to say
thanks and mention that it helps the family.
Notice what
your child does right and
offer a genuine compliment.
Say thank you
when your child does something for you or the family. Say please when
making a request.
Trust your
child. If past behavior
warrants, give your child the benefit of the doubt. When a child shows
responsibility, offer a new freedom in return.
Ask your child for a lesson. There are probably things your child
knows how to do better than you, especially when it comes to technology.
Also ask your child’s opinions on issues that matter to the family.
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Working with money is more than just a way for your child to get the
latest video game. It’s an important skill for practicing math and
responsibility.
You can help your child reinforce money skills this summer if you:
Try an
allowance. If it’s
possible, give your child an allowance to cover expenses, with the
provision that there won’t be any more money from you until the next
allowance time. This teaches budgeting skills.
Shop for the
family. Give your child a
list and money, with the challenge of staying in budget and bringing you
back change.
Figuring
amounts. If you eat at a
restaurant, have your child figure out the tip.
Working.
If your child baby-sits or mows lawns, require him to stick to a plan for
how he will use the money
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to Top
No, you
shouldn’t laugh off all of your preteen’s annoying behaviors. But it’s
vital to find a few chuckles where you can.
Research shows that the average American breaks out in giggles roughly 15
times each day in order to maintain good mental and physical health. Far
from being simple fun and games, though, humor can actually:
J
Help you and your preteen deal with conflict.
J
Improve your mood.
J
Ward off depression.
J
Make it easier to discuss sticky topics like discipline or rules.
Granted, you don’t want to make jokes when your preteen does something
seriously wrong. But to save your sanity during these next few years of
eye-rolling and attitude? A little laugh certainly couldn’t hurt!
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It has been
a busy school year and I am already putting the baseball schedule for
my son’s summer games on my calendar. As your days get filled with
“must do” tasks, remember to take time for those you love. It seems
that we often get things done for everyone around us but do not take
time for our family or our own needs. I found this quote by Henry
Drummond, which puts things into perspective, “You will find as you
look back upon your life that the moments you have really lived are
the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love.”
These are words for all of us to live by.
The PCN office and website will be available to you all summer if you
have questions or need a resource. Please contact us by phone or here
on our website for information on any parenting issue. Remember to
check the
Safe South Dakota site for tips on talking with teens about
alcohol use and driving.
Enjoy the moments this
summer!
Darcy
Jensen and the PCN Board
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