April 2010
Help Your Child
Develop Leadership Skills
Prevent Violence by Working Closely with the Middle School
Look Ahead to the Next Stage in Your Child's Career: High School
Impress Upon
Your Child the Reasons for Respect
A Word From the Director
Many people
think of a leader as one who gives direction. To some extent, that is
true. But real leadership--a desirable character trait--has more to do
with listening, learning and being an example.
Your child can
develop leadership if she is:
Caring. Effective leaders
care. They look for someone who could use help. And then they step up.
Open to new ideas. Leaders know
they don't know it all. They always listen to others.
Organized. Leaders plan ahead.
They know that leaving projects to the last minute usually produces poor
results.
Optimistic. Leaders prepare.
They trust the people they work with. They are enthusiastic. They expect
things to go right and because of their leadership, things usually do.
Flexible.
Leaders don't get stuck in the rut of doing everything the same way every
time. They are willing to try new things.
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The headlines
about school violence are scary. When your child hears about another
troubled kid who has brought a weapon to school--or worse, used it - he
may become frightened.
However your
child responds to the news of classroom violence, use the episode as a
conversation starter. Ask about the environment at his school. Does he
feel safe there? Has he ever felt threatened? Has he seen students acting
violently?
To be part of
the solution to the violence-in-schools problem:
Get involved in school
violence-prevention programs. Many school districts offer these programs.
See if your preteen's school does, too. If it does, find out how you can
pitch in. If there's no such program in place, explore how to start one.
Take
threats seriously. Many students who commit violence at school give clues
about what they're planning. If your preteen mentions how a classmate
threatened to "blow the teacher away," don't dismiss it as an idle threat.
Go to the principal and share the information. Who knows? Your actions may
keep your preteen's school out of the newspaper.
Most of the
school year is gone. Now a big transition looms for many middle schoolers
and their parents. High school is just months away. Start preparing your
child and yourself.
Expect your child
to:
J
Feel excitement about the opportunities high school offers. These include
new friendships and more freedom. High school also lets students pursue a
wide range of interests through extracurricular activities.
J
Feel nervous. Standards
for academics, behavior and independence are far beyond what most middle
schoolers are used to. Then there's the size of high school--a school
building and population that may be double what your child has now.
You can help if
you:
v
Tap available resources. Most
middle schools give guidance about coping in high school. The high school,
too, will likely offer orientation sessions for new students. Urge your
child to attend.
v
Talk to your child. Share some of
your own high school memories. Discuss honestly the classes your child
wants to take and how she will manage her schedule. Have her talk with
current high school students about their experiences.
v
Encourage your
child. Starting high school is a huge milestone. Your child is growing up.
Let her know you are proud of her and are looking forward to this new
stage.
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You have
probably talked many times with your child about how to treat others. But
have you had a good discussion about why? Middle school students are ready
for a higher level of thinking. So it is important that they know the
reasons behind the action. Here are the reasons for being respectful:
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Respectful
behavior is moral and ethical. It's the difference between right
and wrong.
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Respectful behavior is fair. Rude and disruptive behavior is not
fair. The person it is directed at does not deserve it. No one does. It is
also not fair to the people around who are trying to teach and learn.
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Respectful behavior is rewarded. Your child will benefit from a
reputation as a respectful, kind and polite person. Respectful people are
often chosen as leaders. They receive greater responsibilities and
freedoms. Why? Because it is already clear that they know how to treat
others. They are the kind of people others look up to.
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It’s been a long
hard winter, and most everyone is running short – on time, patience and
optimism. It is times like these that may make parents wonder just
what they need to do to get through to their children. Zig Ziglar,
in Raising Positive Kids in a Negative World, points out that,
"Lectures often confuse our kids, but the example we set is crystal
clear." The examples come every day…from the snacks we choose to the
way we spend our free time; from the jokes we tell to the way we treat a
store clerk. What we do speaks louder than what we say. This is
especially true in regards to alcohol, tobacco and other drug use.
Consider carefully not only what you will say to your children about
substances, but also how you will demonstrate what you believe.
I encourage you to
visit our PCN and Prairie View websites for parenting tips and information
on substance use. Please check out these resources. Our goal
is to be a helpful resource for you and your family. The PCN board knows
parenting is an important job and our hope is to provide you with all the
tools you need to be successful.
Darcy Jensen and the PCN Board
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