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Make it
Clear That You Value Honesty
Build
Responsibility Together
Emphasizing the Value of Kindness
A Word From the Director
Make it Clear That You Value
Honesty
Being honest is the foundation of good
character. You can’t be a person of character if you lie, present a false image
to others or go back on your word. Practice honesty with your child and stress
its importance. When your child asks for a reason why he should be honest, try
these:
Honest people have self-respect.
They know who they are and they never have to worry about being “caught” in a
lie.
Honest people have the respect of others. Family
members, teachers and friends will respect him because they know they can count
on him.
“Honesty is the best policy” is more than a saying.
Being honest will keep your preteen out of trouble.
Honesty encourages another good quality
-responsibility. Honest people admit their mistakes and try to fix them.
Honesty will earn your child more freedom. If you can trust your child,
he won’t always have you looking over his shoulder. You may also grant him
privileges. Teachers also tend to give more freedom to students they trust.
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Build Responsibility Together
You want your preteen to grow into a responsible young
adult, so help her along! Here are some ideas you can use to instill a sense of
responsibility in your middle schooler:
Talk about it. Teach your preteen that she’s
responsible for her attitude and the decisions she makes. If things are going
wrong, help her see how her choices might have contributed to the situation.
Help her realize that she has more power than she thinks.
Enforce it. Insist that your middle schooler take responsibility for her
actions. That means allowing her to experience the consequences of those
actions. In other words, don’t rescue her every time she messes up.
Advocate it. Let your middle schooler know that you value
responsibility-related traits like self-control and persistence. When you see
these qualities being put into action—either on TV or in real life—point them
out and discuss them with your preteen. Don’t pass up chances to reinforce your
family’s values.
Model it. There is no better way to teach your
middle schooler responsibility than to model it yourself. Let your preteen see
you taking responsibility for your own mistakes. She will learn more by your
example than she’d learn in an hour of lecturing.
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Emphasizing the Value of Kindness
Being a “mean girl” or a bully is never the way to succeed
in school or in life. Take this quiz to see if you are promoting kindness in
your child.
Answer yes to things you do always or often and answer no
to things you do rarely or never.
__1. I model kindness for my child by treating her and all
others with kindness and respect.
__2. I tell my child that the Golden Rule (treating others
as you would like to be treated) is a very important value in our family.
__3. I promote empathy in my child. “Remember how you felt
when you didn’t get invited to Kaitlyn’s party?”
__4. I praise my child whenever I catch her being kind to
somebody else.
__5. I encourage my child to befriend a wide variety of
students, not just those in her “group,” even if the kids in her group don’t
welcome them as easily.
How well are you doing?
The more yes answers you have means you are demonstrating
kindness to your child. If you have more no answers, try the ideas from the quiz
to help promote kindness.
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Greetings from PCN
Here we are, getting ready for the holiday season - it just
seemed to arrive overnight! As I prepared to write this, I started thinking of
the movie “Click”. The star wants to hurry through some everyday things so he
can get to where he wants to be in life. You know, the raise, the promotion,
the bigger house, and older kids - all of those “it will be easier when”
thoughts. But as the story unfolds, he realizes he has missed some of the most
important parts of his life, the ordinary living of day-to-day joys.
This year my goal is to make holiday memories every day, not just when
the house is clean, the gifts are wrapped or the bills are paid. I invite you
to spend time talking with your family this holiday season and enjoying their
company. I believe this quote by Anthony Brandt puts things into perspective:
“Other things may change us, but we start and end with family.”
So enjoy family and friends this holiday season, and
remember to give yourself time to truly enjoy each day.
Happy Holidays, Darcy Jensen and the PCN board
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