Remember the Importance of
Time at Home
Family time is important to your child, even if she doesn’t always admit
it. Special outings and activities with your child are fun, but he also loves
the safe haven of his home. Routine days may even mean more than “special”
ones.
In one study, middle school children said they value:
ž Ordinary days at home.
ž
Knowing that a loved and trusted
adult is there for them at home.
ž
Having quiet time at home where
they can choose what to do - read, listen to music or daydream.
Disciplining your middle schooler was probably easier a few years ago. Back
then, a time-out or the threat of “no dessert” was enough to straighten her
out. But now that she’s entering young adulthood - and displaying her
attitude more often than you’d like - discipline takes more effort.
There are ways to set limits and enforce consequences that respect your child
and remind her how she’s expected to behave. Here’s what to do:
Be specific. Spell out your expectations. Instead of saying, “Clean up
your school things,” try, “Hang up your coat and put your papers in your
backpack.”
Explain penalties beforehand. Don’t spring new punishments on your
middle schooler. Fill her in ahead of time - “If you get another detention,
you’ll lose TV privileges for one month” - so she’ll have the chance to modify
her behavior.
Don’t discipline in anger. If your middle schooler arrives home well
after curfew, don’t lay into her while you’re seething. Instead, take time to
calm down. “I’m really angry right now. We’ll discuss this tomorrow.”
Have her recite the rules. Make sure she “gets” the rules by having her
say them aloud: “If I curse again, I’ll be grounded for a week.” This helps
clear up any discipline-related misunderstandings before they happen.
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Drawing Up Rules for Online Time
Most parents have rules about what their middle school children may do
when they are out of the house. But what about the online community? Protect
your child by having rules for time spent there, too.
Involve your child when setting rules for online use. Your child should know
the rules are for her safety. Make clear you are not just trying to restrict
her online fun! The Internet is a wonderful resource. Unfortunately, though,
it is also a place where your child could be the victim of a crime. Theft,
bullying and kidnapping have all happened as a result of online communication.
Explain to your child that the rules are to prevent this.
To keep your child safe online, tell her the importance of:
Never meeting in person with an online “friend.”
Never giving out personal information, such as full name, address or
even the name of the town where you live.
Never sending out a picture of yourself.
Always be careful about what you download. It’s best to stick to
sources that end with ‘edu’ or ‘org’.
Always tell a parent or teacher right away if someone sends you
something online that makes you feel uneasy. Do not reply to this kind of mail
- ever.
Always tell a parent or teacher right away if someone sends you an
insulting or abusive message. Again, do not reply to this.
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Greetings from PCN
What a wonderful autumn we’ve had so far! I hope you’re enjoying the
football, the brisk weather and the changing leaves. As the temperatures cool
down, youngsters’ Internet use tends to heat up. While many tech-savvy
parents have long enforced basic computer safety rules, there are some areas
that may be overlooked.
Social networking sites, like MySpace, YouTube and Facebook, are exploding in
popularity – especially with teens and pre-teens. Take some time this month
to talk with your child about these sites. Find out if your teen has a
profile on one, and if so, visit it together.
Happy Harvest Time!
Darcy Jensen and the
PCN Board
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