May 2008
Open Lines of Communication by Doing Chores With Your Teenager
Could Your
Teen be a Victim of Dating Violence?
Don’t
Let Schoolwork Slide as Nice Weather Arrives
Finish the School Year With a Dose of Parent Involvement
A Word From the Director
As a parent, you know that it is important
to spend time with your teen. But you also know how difficult it is to
figure out what to do during this “quality time.” The things you want
to do (that your child used to love) are now “lame,” and the thought
of you going somewhere your teen likes to hang out is “mortifying.”
So how do you spend time with your teen if
you’re not “allowed” to go anywhere? By spending time together—right
at home. Both you and your teen have a list of chores to do around the
house. Consider working together on some of the bigger jobs—and make
sure to spend time talking while you’re working. You and your teen
might:
 Wash
the car together.
Plant
a garden (or weed one that has already been planted).
Paint
a fence or the outside of your home.
Your teen may feel more comfortable opening
up to you while you’re scrubbing opposite sides of the car than when
you’re staring at each other across the dinner table. And as a bonus,
the conversation (and the extra set of hands) will make the job pass
quickly.
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The statistics are shocking. One in three teens knows
someone who has been hit or beaten by a boyfriend. Dating abuse can
happen to any teenager—and parents are often the last to know.
Could your teen be the victim of
dating abuse? Answer yes or no to each of the questions below:
___1. Does your teen’s boyfriend
seem jealous or very possessive? Does he constantly call or text
message her to check up on where
she is?
___2. Has he cut her off from
friends she used to enjoy?
___3. Does she have injuries she
can’t explain—black eyes, bruises? Or is she wearing clothing that
could conceal bruises?
___4. Does he criticize her in
front of friends or family? Have you seen him lose his temper?
___5. Are you uneasy or worried
about her safety for any reason?
How did you do?
Even one yes answer may mean
your teen is at risk of dating violence. Talk with your daughter and
share your fears. Get in touch with the National Teen Dating Abuse
Helpline at 1-866-331-9474 immediately.
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Don’t Let Schoolwork Slide as Nice Weather Arrives
As soon as the days become
longer, students’ attention spans become shorter. It’s like there’s
something in the air besides pollen that entices kids of all ages to
skimp on studying in favor of extra time outdoors. To make sure your
teen is still finishing her homework:
1- Talk about it. Ask questions about her assignments—which one was
the most interesting? Which one was the most difficult? This will
remind your child that even if she doesn’t care about her homework,
you still do.
2 - Time it. If your teen averaged three hours of homework per night
during the winter, a new 15-minute homework average should make you
suspicious. A comment like, “Your teacher sure let up on the homework
suddenly,” might be enough to fix the problem.
3 - Combine it. Suggest that your teen do her reading on the front
steps. That way, she can enjoy the sun—without sacrificing her
homework time.
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Finish the School Year With a Dose of Parent
Involvement
As the school year comes to a
close, it’s as important as ever to keep up your involvement in your
teen’s education. The school - and your teen - still need your help.
To maintain your involvement in your teen’s education:
Keep track of important dates and deadlines - when final exams
are, when half-days or days off are, when graduation practices are,
etc. Your school will appreciate it when your teen shows up where he
is supposed to be, when he is supposed to be there.
Continue
to volunteer at your teen’s school. Even though school’s winding down,
someone is still needed to chaperone a field trip or collate school
newsletters. Ask at your school to see how you can get involved - from
your home or at the school.
Get your teen to school - on time, every day. Attendance is as
important at the end of the year as it was at the beginning, so be
sure to check that your teen is attending classes. He can’t learn if
he’s not there!
Ask about summer learning options. Your school may have summer
classes your teen is interested in taking. Or the school may have a
suggested summer reading list for your teen. Either way, your school
is sure to have some suggestions for avoiding the summer learning
slump.
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Greetings from PCN
The count
down has started. The days before the end of the school year are
numbered and soon we will be enjoying summer time activities. It
seems the weather goes from winter to summer. I just put away my snow
shovel and boots and now we are talking about end of school events and
summer fun. As parents this time of year can be a difficult time with
more questions than answers. Do we need daycare? Who will they be
hanging out with all day? Who is going to the Prom/Graduation
Parties? These are just a few of the questions I have heard from
parents. Take time to plan for these events and your summer. Our PCN
website has many helpful tips for all ages. In addition, the
Safe South
Dakota site offers tips for talking with teens about alcohol use
and driving. Whether you are planning the Prom/Graduation party or
talking about summer care, talk about expectations and safety. Decide
what your family plan will be and follow through on the decisions as a
family. Remember, when we get everyone involved in the process then we
all have a share in the planning and responsibility.
As always
call the PCN office with any questions or resources needs.
Enjoy the warm days and Happy
planning. Darcy Jensen and the PCN Board
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