January, 2008

Ask Yourself Questions When Creating Rules for Your Teen
Questions & Answers
Beware of ‘Pharming’ - New Trend in Teen Substance Abuse
A Word From the Director

Ask Yourself Questions When Creating Rules for Your Teen

As your teen grows older, he needs fewer rules. But you still need to set limits on what is and isn’t allowed. The key to setting effective rules for your teen is balance. He needs independence but you still need to keep some control. Rules will be different for each family. But here are some questions to ask yourself as you are setting rules for your teen:

Has my teen had a chance to talk about this rule with me? Teens should have input about rules, although parents should always make the final decision.

Will this rule help my teen develop independence? Teens need to learn how to think for themselves. They need a chance to make choices and live with them. But they can’t handle every choice. For example, by high school, teens can decide when to study, but not whether to study.

Am I setting an example of following this rule? If you don’t wear your seat belt when driving in a car, you shouldn’t be surprised to discover your teen isn’t wearing one when he is driving with his friends.

Does my teen know what will happen if the rule is violated? The time to decide is before the rule is broken.

Questions & Answers

Q: My husband and I want to go out of town for a weekend. My daughter is 16 and she says is just too old to have a babysitter. She wants to stay home alone. She is usually very responsible. Should I allow her to stay by herself?

A: Here’s the short answer: No. Your daughter is probably very responsible. But in today’s world, there are just too many things that can go wrong.

Take the true story about a teen who invited a few friends to a party. They invited a few more. Then word about the party was posted on MySpace. Before she knew what was happening, the teen host had a houseful of people she didn’t know. It wasn’t long before the police arrived. The parents arrived home to a house that had been trashed and a daughter who now had a police record.

So does that mean you can never leave home until your teen goes to college? No, there are other ways to make sure she has the supervision she needs.

Probably the easiest is to arrange for her to stay with a friend. It should be someone you know, who shares your basic ideas about rules and curfews. If you have family nearby, your daughter could also stay with them. Or see if a trusted adult could stay in your home. If your teen is a member of a youth group, see if there is a young female adviser you might invite.

Beware of ‘Pharming’ - New Trend in Teen Substance Abuse

A recent study found a frightening trend among today’s teens: They are more likely to abuse prescription and over-the-counter medications than most illegal drugs. The Partnership for a Drug-Free America states that nearly one in five teens has tried prescription medication to get high. One in 10 teens admits to using cough medicine to get high. Teens have a false sense of security about abusing medications. They think that since doctors often prescribe them, they are safer to use than illegal drugs like marijuana and Ecstasy. Teens also reported that they have easier access to medications than illegal drugs - more than three in five teens say prescription and over-the-counter medications are easy to get from parents’ medicine cabinets. So what can you do?

Talk to your teen about the dangers of drug use. Explain that abusing any drug is harmful, whether it’s legal or illegal. Medications can be just as damaging as illegal drugs.

Keep a close eye on your own prescription and over-the-counter medicine. If you notice that you need to refill your prescription earlier than you should, it’s definitely time to talk with your teen.

Greetings from PCN

Another year is upon us and as we start using our new calendars, we have a chance to clean the slate and set our priorities for the New Year. Sometimes we get into a rut and believe we need to do something a certain way because it has always been done “that way”. The New Year gives us permission to make changes and take a look at the things we have made priorities. As a family, talk about goals and what is important to each family member. Have your family sit down and decide what activities are important to the family. Giving everyone a voice brings your family together and allows for planning. I recently found some old lists from our family’s activities and goal setting. It was fun to look back at what we wanted to do and then reminisce about the things we did and accomplished that year. Remember: it is not how much we do that counts, it is whom we are with at the time. Take time to enjoy your family and start the New Year fresh. As always call the PCN office if any have questions or are in need of a resource. Enjoy your family time.

Darcy Jensen and the PCN Board

Back to Top